be entitled or appointed to act or speak for (someone)
a set of circumstances in which one finds oneself
HEY, I’m back! Please forgive me for being so tardy. Sadly, I haven’t been able to think up a good topic until now. (And technically today I have two topics.) So what have I been up to…..? GREAT QUESTION! (LOL I need a life) Last week I had my awesome uncle and adorable cousin over, last weekend I left for a church retreat (aka the BOMB DIGGITY), and this week I had my aunt, uncle and cousins over. Okay, enough about me.
1st topic: RESET RETREAT and the lessons learnt
2nd topic: My small situation
So, to begin my first topic I would like to personally thank Christy and Lucas Miles for preparing the amazing retreat that our church was able to go on and I would like to thank room #13 (you know who you are). Reset Retreat… for those of you who don’t know, this was my first retreat EVER! Review: CRAZY AMAZING AND AWESOME. I had a blast dancing with Emunah and learning so much in such little time.
One of the main things that I learned in this retreat was cutting emotional ties. Ahh, my area of expertise (NOT.) (Disclaimer; I don’t usually open up this publicly, but I feel that this is something that many people need to hear. I am not releasing full details and if you would like to know more, just contact me personally.) During the first day of the retreat, my eyes were quickly opened to some burdens that I was pretty sure were gone. Around this time last year I dealt with a lot of bullying (in a manner of the word), betrayal, and heartbreak. Physical and mental ties were cut extremely quick, but I began to ignore how much the hurt was affecting my emotions. I had forgiven the people, but I constantly reminded myself of what they did to me. During the retreat, one of the leaders made me realize how much this affected me. If you would just bring up the topic, I would become a sobbing mess. I thought I was free, but that was just a self-imposed lie. The idea that I couldn’t let go was so heart wrenching, so painful. I couldn’t find a way out of my invisible maze. Prayer and faith was all it took. So simple, so do-able. The second I released those ties was the second that a real smile returned to my face. When you go from such hurt to amazing joy, you don’t know how to react. I guess what I’m trying to say is that no matter how small or invisible the problem seems, it can always be mended back together by God. He has full control and power over what happens in our lives and I would never regret the hurt that happened to me. I learned and matured in a way that could not have been done any other way. So, keep your chin up and release all those transparent ties that hold you down.
So, as I just stated, I have been hurt by people. (Haven’t we all :/) But never in a million years did I expect to be stuck in the sort of predicament for a repeat of hurt. It’s like hoping to fail on Wipeout twice, uhhh no thanks. Now before I get into this, another disclaimer (anotha one.) Yes, I am homeschooled. No, I am not antisocial. Yes, Christian homeschoolers can be mean (it’s called the lack of drama.) Okayyyy… So, since the beginning of this summer I’ve been planning out my 11th grade classes with my mom and everything was going great. I mean EVERYTHING. And then it comes, the one thing that turns out to be not so great. One of the kids who hurt me two years ago was going to be in the same exact Marine Biology course as me. Let me tell you, those chances were slim to start with, but of course God likes to be funny. AH THE IRONY. My parents first (understandable) thoughts were to not take the course at all and my mind went NO. I’m not gonna act like I want to be some Marine Biologist in the future, but I wasn’t going to let this class slip by either. Since getting hurt, I’ve changed a bunch. If you’ve met me in the past 6 months, then you probably think I’m super social and friends with everyone. (That’s totally new and not a usual me.) My new mindset and renewed faith brought me to get the guts to beg in order to stay in class. Just like I wouldn’t let my feelings for a boy hinder my education, I won’t let a boy that I don’t agree with hinder my education. I have no idea how bad or well this class is going to go, but I’m ready for the challenge. Scared, but ready. So, no matter how impossibly horrible or horrendous the situation seems, I want you to know that you can get past it with a smile. And as Selena Gomez would say, “Kill ’em with kindness.”
I love you all so much and I hope to be back soon. <3<3<3
“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”
― Oscar Wilde
“Whenever you are confronted with an opponent. Conquer him with love.”
― Mahatma Gandhi
“A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends.”
― Baltasar Gracián